Love, Life...or something like it

Sunday, May 25, 2008

pardon me frenchies

Someone once said that there are 3 things which you can't undo. Time lost, opportunities missed and words spoken. Those are great and timeless wisdom imparted, but the trouble with me is, I never learn. Today, I said things which I shouldn't have to someone who didn't deserve it at all. My words and my impeccable timing used to get me into trouble when I was much younger. Once, I was sent to the naughty step, and on a few occassions, received threats from the parents to have my tongue cut off. And now, given the prospects of things, I'm thinking, 'why didn't they?'

The pain caused today was much too much, the reason unjustified, and the damage caused is simply too late for cure. And while I'm wandering aimlessly for ways to rectify, I feel more of a fool thinking that I didn't mean the things I've said. But I know that, justification at this point, is as pointless as sphere.

I want to beg for forgiveness but even if I did receive such graciousness, I would forever be hounded with the guilt for that splinter etched in your heart.

I should have known. The other day I let a friend read my palm. And she said that I burn bridges and build an island for myself, out of convenience of others, and not out of own choice. I struggled to see the relevance then. But now I see it. I really shouldn't be allowed to talk to people.

I think the greater lesson to be learnt here, amongst many others, is to get. over. self. I should be ashamed of myself, to parade here my feelings of loss and grief. Knowing that those feelings are of a higher, much, much, much higher magnitude right now in the likes of Sichuan.

Maybe I should donate.

Let us all donate. Oxfam Hong Kong.